I’m in the market for a new car, and I’ve been weighing all my options. I started with the convertible Challenger to unleash the muscle-car animal in me. I never had one of these gnarly rides as a young man, and I’ve always wanted one. Especially now that I’m fifty.
But like many things American these days, Dodge has under delivered. Dealers tell me they won’t be out until 2012. Maybe that’s a good thing, saving me from myself. Plus, imagine the flack I’d catch on my green marketing blog tooling around in this gas-guzzler, although I do only live one mile from my office, so I’ve got that going for me.
I think the Prius is too prissy for a macho man like me.
So Michele and I went to the Toyota dealer to test drive a red Prius, one of the hottest cars on the market. It drove great and had a lot of spunk. But the tires are too small and the interior was a smidge cramped. By the way, if you every use “smidge” to describe anything about a car, you probably shouldn’t buy it. “Smidges” become large, long-term annoyances.
I told Michele it just wasn’t “Manly-man” enough for me. She said I sounded ridiculous.
So did our our 17.5-year-old son, Caed, but for a different reason. He was so crestfallen at the thought of me abandoning the “sick” Challenger for a puny Prius that he couldn’t look me in the eye for two days. I suppose it’s often difficult for eco-consciousness and testosterone to coexist.
Hmmm, what are my options? How about the all-electric Tesla Roadster 2.5? It’s perfect. My cool factor will go through the roof, I can blaze around town leaving Ferraries driven by broken Scottsdale commercial real estate brokers and platinum blond princesses standing still at the green light, all while I’m doing my part to save the planet. As I snapped out of my daydream, my 2004 Acura 3.2 TL responded to my corrective maneuver and swerved back onto the road. Reality reminded me that the $120,000 roadster wasn’t very sustainable for my bank account or my marriage.
“That’s it,” I decided. “I’m going ‘All In’”! If the Challenger is too much muscle, and the Prius is too prissy, and the Tesla is too fanciful, then what about an all electric Ford Focus? I understand they’re coming to Phoenix this summer. I can put charging stations at our office and offer free parking to electric vehicles during the high traffic lunch and dinner crowds across the parking lot at the strip center.
The Ford Focus plays to my sometimes irresponsible early-adopter cravings. I’m intrigued by the hi-tech buzz around its interior electronics. It might be kind of like driving around my iPad. Unlike the Prius, it burns no fossil fuels. And, living in the center of the Valley of the Sun, I am a perfect candidate for an electric car to whiz around town. AND, it apparently comes in red.
So what do you think? Can the Ford Focus somehow fuse the fun of a convertible Challenger, with the smartness of the Prius, with the coolness of a Tesla Roadster? Probably not, but I might just try to plug into one all the same.